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UNDERNEATH

by Isaac Fosl-van Wyke

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1.
1. The Crimson Bride riding away through the dark, i saw you believe in yourself, just a spark. i felt ev’ry hoofbeat between you with yr horsepower’d handful of light, through the steam. shivering cold, curving through the town, holding the moonlight up to your cheek... like a rumor of the crimson bride hiding in the jimson weed, potions of poison in both of her hands: one for the woman, and two for the man. do you believe she’d given up tryin to reckon with the loss and wrestle the rage, just to end up unseen? shake those invisible bones leaning your body towards a home. tuning your voice to the stars turnin’ away from the lights of the evening cars: arriving from the town, and settling down into the night... the engines as cool as their dreams hiding with the crimson bride, as broken machines, no gears in their minds. drifting away in tendrils of steam. do you believe they’ve given up crying, just like you and me and wrestle the rage with tears in their eyes that end up unseen? thick is the air that we breathe, stuck between the layers of sunlight and seeds. it hasn’t rained here in hours. the summer’s been arranging the light into leaves, and then flowers ‘till they fall down steady as the rain onto the eaves all over town where we’ve seen the crimson bride dragging her veil of night, bleeding from the sun daylight, feedin’ it to the moon: o, what a scene. we cheered her on for giving us time to reckon with the loss, as she wandered around drunk, dragging behind ribbons of our dreams. we’ve seen the crimson bride.
2.
2. Livin’ In the Graveyard after a speech by Winona LaDuke at the University of Oregon following the 2016 presidential election Livin’ in the graveyard, carvin’ these caves into the icebergs, faraway time inside a cell phone, spellin’ out only all the nice words. Every day, sleepin’ in the end-times, hit the snooze- button till it’s broken, & all the while dreamin’ of the buildings, thousands of windows bust open, and from inside… Y’all don’t know what to do with the shame of this story but paint red, white and blue the chains of hissstory, and argue all day through, who is and who isn’t, but-you built my brother’s school in the shape of a prison. ...while you were diggin’ in the graveyard, buryin’ tomahawks and hatchets, smile enough to charge it on the paycard, carryin’ parking lots of fat debt… pilin’ up religions of the empire, carving our faces into the mountains, hopin’ we can dry-erase entire peoples but they come back ‘round when… we’re all Livin’ in the graveyard, try’na find where all this hate began, & what the hell would it even mean for us to try and make “america” “great” “again”?… what about the millions of buffalo, & what about the skies dark with birdwings, billions of names we’ll never know, & all the voices that we never heard sing? in the land of the free… I don’t know how you feel proud of this country. You scream “red, white and blue!” so loud and so hungry. Not like i want to just make y’all feel crappy, But don’t sit there and preach that the slaves were all happy. Now you’re lyin’ in the deathbed, wondering What about the grandkids, this is such a poisonous world for them, even though the heartbeat of the land is… underneath an avalanche of hashtags, & underneath the ashes are the embers, & underneath an island made of trashbags, some of the forgotten ones remember… re-member, re-member: I can see why we feel shamed by this story. Melt red, white and free the chains of hissstory. I don’t know how you might could come to believe it, but concrete crumbles too when you grow from beneath it.
3.
3. Coming Of Age i don’t know my heart from a hole in the ground. said that i was in love, but i was bluffin’. but thin on the wind what’s that faint beating sound? i asked the old man, he said nothin’. he said: “deep in a hole in the ground, a boy just like you, well his body was found. you’re coming of age in a strange kinda town.” i don’t know my mind from a canyon in the sea i thought that i did in my twenties you ask the old man how much he threw away: if you asked him today, he’d say plenty. he’d say: “deep in a canyon in the sea, new york city trash from the last two centuries. now you’re coming of age in the land of the free.” free to join the army, or the office, or the jail: choose your industrial complex. you said that you read of some other kind of trail, but you ask’d the old man, he said nonsense. he said: “deep in a Congolese mine, i found the one missing piece to your cell phone’s design. you’re coming of age in a strange kinda time.” the ocean will rise and she’ll swallow up the land. that won’t be a time for the keepin’. stare at your screen all night long while you can. you could ask the old man, but he’s sleepin. he’s sleeping deep in a hole in the ice. where the speed of your getaway car won’t suffice. you’re coming of age at a mighty high price it was not the blue of the sky or the sea, it was blue as the tears that you’re cryin: that was the bird that flew down next to me. i tried to show the old man, but he’s dyin. now deep in the marrow of your bones there lives a liquid old soul and she knows this is home. you’re coming of age, & maybe tremblin with rage, on some neon-lit stage, but you sure ain’t alone. na cuz i found my heart in a hole in the ground. it could have been a canyon or a quarry. i miss the old man now that he ain’t around. he came in a dream and said sorry. he said: “deep in a hole in the sky, i can finally see you through a new kind of eye. now ain’t no one of age in our strange kind of cage, and it’s definitely too late, but not too late to try.”
4.
see brutality we seen before five centuries, even older don’t want to fight the empire’s war i don’t want to be a quiet soldier this time not gonna swallow my rage and stand around not while they’re pressin his face into the ground you try to be neutral on this moving train while the motion sickness screws up yr brain and it shows every body knows [2x] some bodies sayin “i can’t breathe” while some bodies on the other side of town in the shade of the family tree: blood on the leaves, blood on the roots, way down whisperin: “i don’t want no body mad at me” nah, you’d rather wallow in shame and apathy. tell it to the newborn babe, cryin, placed in the beartrap jaws of american irons as they close every body knows [2x] hearin’ platitudes we hear every time: that white noise, k-k-kodes of silence. your body’s gonna walk that line: the thin blue thread stitchin’ laws into violence. O, my god, don’t you feel that fear and trembling? oh and daddy don’t don’t you hear that rumbling? coming from the deep-down place where the body heals, the one that i can see in your face as you pretend not to feel but it just grows… every body knows [2x] i don’t want your body to be let down, be let down [6x]
5.
5. House of Waves (When You Roar) keeping time with the ocean breathing inside the planet line of birds tore it open sweeping wide your horizon we are all smaller than it [3x] how do you inhabit the animal home, animal indeed, but who is enough, animal alone, unable to feed, how do you inhabit the animal when you call through the door. turn that rusty knob a little more. time goes back to normal when you roar. keeping time with the virus breeding all across the planet galaxies deep inside us we are all smaller than it we are all smaller than it [3x] how do you inhabit the animal home, / animal indeed, but what is enough, / animal alone, unable to feed, / how do you inhabit the animal when you fall through the floor bring back some sand from the other shore ocean freezes over when you roar keeping time with the tiny glow inside every hand, its virus spreads through the dark with threads of fire from the planet we are all smaller than it [3x] keeping time with the lovers writhing inside the spirit waves and sand rolling over twinned in star-shiny sockets how do you inhabit the animal home, animal indeed, but where is enough, animal alone, unable to feed, how do you inhabit the animal with your lips of moon, shared erosion ( call… ) shaping shoreline division ( to the shore ) breaking land from the ocean ( breaking like sand ) breathing time on the planet ( over the roar ) love is spread through the dark with threads of fire from the planet rising red from the ocean we are all smaller than it time was never normal, all these waves around the chimney, singing “we are time, we are time, we are time…”
6.
Darling 02:58
6. Darling double vision in the water inside the womb single trouble on the staircase up to your room pounding on the darkest hallways stumble through your fever dream but you don’t have to fear darling know i love you always everyone was waiting for your face to appear twin hearts fill the golden window with a flickering feel skin breaks on the weave of moonbeams cold air and steel sounding through the widest canyon “aren’t you coming with me?” one and only cry “darling” echoes my companion “i am with you always, dear even though i die”
7.
11. Lightning Underneath all these constellation calls all this reachin star to star now that’s how far it feels: really fuckin’ far really fuckin’ far your planetary eyes i saw ’em rollin in your sleep then i kissed those lids goodbye: lightnin’ underneath lightnin’ underneath the angels’ dream of symmetry it’s stretch’d thin between him & me i wish the clouds could sift it into snow but as above, my love: not so below now summer just was here it seems the sun has hardly past the days melt into years really fuckin’ fast really fuckin’ fast hurdling away (star bodies fade) hardly time to hold (our bodies, babe) but a person cannot pray cursin’ in the cold void cursin’ in the cold so i’m flyin my kite with a skeleton key and i’m trying to strike down my jealousy i wish the clouds could sift it into snow but as above, my love, not so below i wanna fly right through your storm (before it’s over) like river veins through a leaf (to be together) skin on skin is warm lightnin’ underneath lightnin’ underneath now we hold it up to sip (star bodies flow) this river cupped in our hands (our bodies know) there’s love in every drip and we’re thirsty as the sand thirsty as the sand i could summon wings of steel so easily, and cheap and i’d never have to feel the lightnin’ underneath lightnin’ underneath there’s stories bleedin’ in between all the angel’s broken teeth after wrestling with the dream lightnin underneath there’s lightnin underneath the feathers & steel & whatever-else changed when the angels’ dreams got rearranged i wish the clouds could sift it all into snow but as above, my love: not so below as above, my love: not so below from the fractals in yr mind (our bodies fade) to the freckles on yr cheeks (star bodies, babe) our precious little time has lightnin underneath lightnin underneath lightnin underneath lightnin underneath lightnin underneath

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released October 1, 2021

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Isaac Fosl-van Wyke Louisville, Kentucky

Isaac Fosl-van Wyke is a songwriter and puppeteer based out of Louisville, KY.

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